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Monthly Archives: January 2009

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I sure hope I’m not jinxing anything by posting this, but it looks like Orlando got a job!  The movie is called Sympathy For Delicious and it’s about a rock star or something.  Who cares what it’s about, Orly got a job!!!  Good work Orly.  I will ignore the wig.

Now if I may step out of character for a minute…I really hope Orlando does well in this movie.  Unlike a lot of you, I suspect there might be more to him than a pretty face.  (At least I hope there is, I mean I wasted my youth waiting for Val Kilmer to do something really, really spectacular and all I got was The Doors, but I digress.)

As I was saying, I think our Orly might have a great performance in him somewhere.  Laugh at me if you will, but I thought he did a decent job in Haven, and I was very pleasantly surprised by The Calcium Kid.  I believe in you man!

I will be there with bells on when the movie comes out.

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My dear readers,

A short while ago I wrote a post about an imaginary conversation between Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr.  In that post I strongly implied that Miranda Kerr was secretly trolling the internet and starting fights with Orlando’s fans.  I also suggested that Ms. Kerr didn’t have the guts to pick a fight with me.

Within minutes, a poster appeared on Just Jared pretending to be me.  She said, among other things, that I have the face of a monkey and that I was too embarassed to post a picture of myself.  (You can read the comments on this thread and this one.) Read More »

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I would like to thank the following people for making this day possible:

Emmett Till

Medgar Evers

James Chaney

Addie Mae Collins

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Denise McNair

And all the thousands of nameless, faceless others who suffered and died so I could have a nice cushy life and grow up to vote for Barack Obama.  I could never repay you in a million lifetimes.  Thank you.

You know what’s dumb about Haven?  The fact that Orlando was supposed to be all ugly after he got splashed with acid.  I mean, who are they kidding?  He still looks totes hot.  I’d still fuck him.  Put a paper bag over his head and fuck him.  In a cubicle. Read More »

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