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Some of you have been wondering what I’ve been up to of late. Some of you already know, but I’ll recap. Because I’m a narcissist, of course.

First, I met one of my conjoined triplets last week. If you haven’t met Jacks yet, please do check her out as she is quite awesome and one of the funniest people alive.  Jackie came to NYC last Friday, but she didn’t tell me she was coming until the Wednesday before.  This gave me approximately 36 hours to lose 15 pounds and get my hair did.  In the end I decided to go for the muumuu and ponytail.  A fabulous time was had by all.

In other news, I quit my job.  Yes, the rumors are true.  I’m moving upstate, goodbye good old NYC.  I hate to leave, but it’ll be nice not to have to spend my entire paycheck on child care and Metrocards.  Also I’ll be living a couple of towns away from my other excellent friend Shadodottir, so I’ll have all the folk music I could want and free babysitting.  Just kidding about the babysitting.  (You should probably check her out though if you haven’t already).

Yes, I did say I was going to save money on child care, because I’m going to be (drumroll, please) a stay-at-home mom.  Yay for me!  Everyone keeps telling me that I’ll get bored because I’m a dynamic doer and Type A and all that crap, but nuts to that.  I’m gonna sit on my ass and watch Jerry Springer til the cows come home.  Maybe my kids won’t be deliquents if I’m home with them, eh?  Hope springs eternal.

The hardest part was telling my peeps at work.  As you may or may not know I’m the manager of my department and I’m the bestest boss ever.  My philosophy is to let them do whatever they want and come and go as they please.  That way when they don’t do their work and I get “disappointed” they feel very, very guilty.  It works, trust.  I’m almost never disappointed.

Anyhoo, I told them and immediately three of them started bawling.  (Aside to Daners, I had to ban LG from my office that day because every time she looked at me she burst into tears).  OK, I’m not so narcissistic as to think it’s all because of me.  They’re also scared to death because who the hell knows who they’re going to get to replace me.  Hell, I’d cry too.  The guy I replaced almost had the lot of them in handcuffs by the time he was done.

I’ll bet you my last paycheck that even though I gave them six weeks notice they won’t have a replacement for me by the time I leave.

That is all.  Questions?

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22 Comments

  1. Good luck to you Wanda! You’ll be an awesome stay-at-home Mom. I should know as I am a mediocre one! 🙂

    • Daners Isadora a.k.a. Busty St. Clair
    • Posted June 20, 2008 at 9:58 pm
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    • Reply

    Good luck, Wanda! You’ll be a fabulous stay at home mum.

    Aw, LG!!!! Tell her I’m giving her a hug right now! And you were like their coolest boss ever! I know! She told me so.

  2. You already sound like a good mom, I bet you’d be a good stay-at-home one as well.

    Sidenote:
    Jerry, Jerry, Jerry!

    On no other show can you find a transsexual who married their hermaphrodite cousin. 🙂

  3. Way to go, Wanda!

    You’ll never regret it. Trust me, a type A can find plenty to do at home. 🙂

  4. Not to mention, if you decide to do something part-time, working from home rules. I finished a job an hour ago with the cat across my feet. It just doesn’t get any better than that.

    OK, it would if Will Smith was across my feet, but that’s kind of a stretch.

  5. I’d cry if you weren’t going to be my boss anymore too, Wanda. What will happen to the Orlando picture on the wall? Maybe they’ll leave it up to remind them of you and your special brand of greatness.

    Stay at home moms with crushes on Orlando Bloom FTW!

  6. Don’t worry Anners, Orlando will come with me. I’ll have plenty of walls in my new house.

    Daners, I should totally get LG to visit us in cyberspace.

  7. Jerry’s out. I think you should consider Judge Judy, Judge Roy Brown, etc. Those court shows are hilarious… Hmmm… how would I know? I go home for lunch.

  8. Yes! We’re doing the happy dance up north with the anticipated influx of coolness! And, babysitting is a possibility, once the kids feel comfortable with whoever I am. (Meaning they don’t know me from anyone yet, not that I have MPD.)

    I would expect that the new hometown is every so much cooler that Orlando was just hoping for a reason to travel there, so you’ll probably have to set up a guest room for him early-on.

  9. OH… and you won’t need to watch TV to see odd life forms, where you’re headed. Did I tell you about the Santa-bearded, shirtless guy wearing a necktie and sandals, downtown in the dead of winter. He’s about average.

    There are more birds outside the sanctuary than in it.

  10. You’re right Pan, Judge Judy rocks.

    That guy sounds like a million laughs SD. And you should definitely fix up the guest room for Orlando, I’m counting on him coming to visit the Bhuddist center in Ithaca. It’s all part of my diabolical plan.

  11. Stay away from the Jerry Springer – if ur going to waste time come online with us more.

    Remember quality over quantity. It sucks when ur mommy is home but would rather spend time in bed with a book then play with u.

  12. Frankly Wanda it sounds like the positives waaaaay outmeasure the negatives in your new arrangement. Good for you! I know you’ve made a brilliant decision (and I’m a little envious!).

  13. w00t for you! You’ll love it. And you deserve the break.

    And you looked beautiful– no need to get your hair didded.

  14. Aw, shucks.

    w00t for me!

  15. Hey Wanda,
    Congrats on the life changing decision. I too did this not long ago. Cheers to you and getting Orlando on the phone!
    All the best:)

  16. First time didn’t work so I’m trying this again.
    Bravo Wanda! I too recently quit my job and although Jerry Springer doesn’t turn my crank, I find my addiction to gossip sites is moving full speed ahead.
    Anyway CHEERS to you and your quest with Orlando!

  17. Hi Tallulah,

    Your comments went into spam for some reason. Thanks though!

  18. Bravo Wanda! I too left my job this year, a life change decision I do not regret. Cheers to you and to finding Orlando’s phone number:)

  19. Sorry for the millionth post:( Thought it was my computer, sorry!

  20. Wanda – so awesome. And I guess when I decide last minute to go to the music festival I know who to call for a couch to stay on?

  21. I’ve got the guest room all made up Wenderina! OK, I haven’t moved in yet. But please do e-mail a sister if you’re ever in town.


One Trackback/Pingback

  1. By Deadpan » So Long New York on 04 Aug 2008 at 2:15 pm

    […] I told you guys a couple of months back that I quit my job, bought a house upstate and was downsizing my life.  Well, after a few home buying-related hitches I’m finally outta here.  The good news is that, as predicted, they haven’t found a replacement for me at work yet.  This means that I’ll still be working for them indefinitely, although I’ll be working remotely and in my pajamas.  And I’ll be getting paid.  Yay for me.  The bad news is that I’m leaving NYC. […]

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