Funny thing about those message boards, you just never know what you’re going to read. For instance, I learned recently that Miranda Kerr looks like a cabbage. I spent a couple of days thinking that, OK, maybe she does sort of, in a strange way resemble a cabbage. Then I realized that they were probably talking about a Cabbage Patch Doll, which makes a lot more sense.
Some message boards are very strict and Nazi-like about the comments that you’re allowed to make, which is very honorable, but farking boring if you ask me. I like the no-holds-barred boards, they make me feel much better about myself. I feel better about myself because I know that I would never compare Orlando’s girlfriend to a cabbage. Maybe I think she looks like a cabbage and maybe I don’t, but I won’t say so either way. Why? Because even I know that while she might look like a vegetable, or any random inanimate object for that matter, she still has a lot more modeling contracts that I have. I don’t have any, so if I said she was ugly that would totally be sour grapes on my part. I may not be a hot model but I’m very self-aware. And I’m still fabulous anyway, so I don’t care so much about the state of my modeling career.
I’ve been peeking around the boards lately and I see that some of the Bloomies are up in arms about his girlfriend who doesn’t necessarily look like a cabbage. That’s another thing I find funny about the board regulars. They all seem to know the most intimate details about Orlando’s life, which is pretty ridiculous because if they were in a position to know about these things they sure as hell wouldn’t be talking about it all over the internet. Anyway, from what I gather they’re all upset because Non-Cabbage was recently dating some guy named Jay and she cheated on him with Orlando and isn’t she a bitch for that, and now she and Orlando are a couple but everyone knows it’s all fake because they’re just using each other to further each other’s careers and he’s a big liar with no talent who can’t get a decent acting job these days if his life depended on it and they can’t believe they ever liked him in the first place. Oh, and he farks everything that moves.
(I don’t know why I keep saying “fark.” It’s better than “fuck,” isn’t it?)
So, even though I’m stealing this idea from Anners, here’s some interesting stuff I found on the boards. And if you guys would write more and keep me entertained I wouldn’t have to be stealing your material, or trolling the message boards for that matter.
LOL. How long is she going to run with this lie. Orlando did not go to Sydney with her and she won’t admit it, He didn’t go to the dinner. LOL and he wasn’t at the airport with her. She told the press he was “holed up in his hotel”. Please try and use logic people. Why would he go and then stay holed up in his hotel the whole time. The whole thing is a ruse!
Looks natural… NOT!
Urgh she is ugly in that pic, god she really is fugly and a butterface- now I get why some of his fans like her- she is prob uglier than them lmao!!
He lies all the time, what is true about him anymore??
The girls that he has had sex with are (the ones we are aware of of course):
(I don’t know who these people are.)
Haven’t you seen Haven? He was very sweet and sensitive with his girlfriend, it was very believable and Orlando himself said that his character in that movie was the closest to who he is in real life
She’s not even that cute. We ORLANDO fans know they will be over before the end of the year. I don’t hate when he gets a girl friend as long as she’s right for him say Jennifer Aniston or Naomie Harris. Underwear girl is too cheesy. SHE MAKES A LIVING IN HER UNDERWEAR FOR GOSH SAKES!
she has gotten him to oz, but it doesn’t appear that he is cooperating and doing the big papfest she was counting on. No pictures of them together yer, no show at her big night, not supposed to go to any shows. It seems like he may be living up to what ever contract that said he had to make one trip to Oz but he is doing as little as he possibley can. I think this final trip may very weill be the end of the whole thing. I think she has opened her mouth and gushed one too many times. Andnow I will post at his tread, because the girl is famous only for who her luggage is, and doesn’t deserve the attention her own thread gives her. I would love to see hardly any posts here.
Everytime we see this girl it mention’s orlando in her interviews and magazine articles this girl has no career besides the fact for being known as orlandos girl and thats what she makes it seem like because when they mention it she is so quick to respond shes gonna be old news in the summer when orlando dumps her!!!
i dont uderstand the heat that models who date actors get it’s sad toee women jelous of another women and throu up thier hate
I don’t think anyone here cares if he sees more than Miranda. In fact I think most are praying for it!!!
I hope he has three or four on the side. Just keep away from the cabbage soup. It’s bad for your health.
That man has orlandos dozy expression, doubt his coq is that big like.
(I know that one was off-topic, but I just had to include it.)
How a man never cares about a woman who has had loads of sex partners.. Condoms split- no guarantee! How a man can start to date a woman within WEEKS of her splitting with her long term partner who she said she LOVED. How a man can be with an obvious famewhore who uses his name at every opportunity for her own gain. How a man can be with a woman who keeps giving snippets of info about said relationship whilst pretending she does the opposite. How a man cant see a woman is an out and out liar. How a man can be with a woman who has shown her naked body to the world. I will never understand it. Sex can be gotten from more discreet places, and there are better women to have a relationship with.
She must have given him the best BJ he has everh had.
That is a bunch of garbage and lies.
God, I LOVE this place! What a nice relief from the Obama “Bittergate”.
Orlando knows there are two types of women in the world, and he knows which Miranda is – after all, he’s had about 1000 of them
I wonder who this poor Jay guy is? I’ll be he knows how to get in touch with Orlando.