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My excellent friend Danners wrote a post about The Skinny Website a few days ago.  I had never heard of this site before, but based on Danners’ (and others’) remarks, I knew I just had to have a look and, ahem, weigh in on the subject.

The Skinny Website claims to be the “FIRST and ORIGINAL celebrity diet and weight gossip site.”  Why the world needs such a thing is completely beyond me, but since they claim to have had over 21 million visitors, I guess I’m just not that smart.  What the site really is is a bunch of pictures of movies stars showing their fat, lack of fat, cellulite, and alleged pregnancy “bumps”.  Visitors are invited to remark on the pictures.

The site owner developed The Skinny Website because, according to her, she’s addicted to celebrity gossip, and since everyone else is breaking on celebrities anyway, why not have fun with it?  Why not, indeed.   

This person purports to take a passive role in the goings-on on her website.  It’s not her problem if people leave nasty comments about celebrities and speculate about their mental or physical health.  There’s even a disclaimer about it.  She’s not a dietician.  Not a mental health professional.  It’s just facts and speculation, she “make(s) no claims and guarantee(s) nothing!” 

OK.

Ironically, the comments on the site are heavily moderated.  Don’t worry, you can say whatever you want about Nicole Ritchie or Kirstie Alley, but whatever you do don’t disparage the website or its owner or you’ll be deleted handily.

So how bad could it be?  Read for yourself.

Here are a few comments about (fat) Jennifer Love Hewitt:

“Look up pear-shaped and this picture comes up.  If that were me I’d avoid all beaches.”

“You’re looking at the new poster girl for laziness….There’s curvy, there’s heavy yet happy, then there’s this.”

“…WOW has she really gotten out of shape.  Her body is absolutely grotesque below the waist, she REALLY needs to exercise-she’s covered in cellulite and fat as far as her hips and thighs go….Her boobs are fake by the way, NOT natural, just so you all know.  I do like her, I just can’t stand the body she’s let go to shit.”

And a few remarks about (skinny) Amy Winehouse:

“She looks terrible, not only thin but soooo ugly!”

“I don’t think she looks that thin from before! But she does look like a crackhead, hee hee!”

“Well, she kinda does look like a boy with boobs, LOL!”

And some truly priceless comments about (really skinny) Kate Bosworth:

“She probably just went back to consuming copious amounts of cocaine.  Whatever, I’m so over this coke fiend.”

“She looks like a homeless 12 year old boy….Like many celebs she’s hideous and not a natural beauty….”

“She’s a talentless 20 something who looks like a 44 year old hag.”

“She looks like Gollum.  Seriously I half expect her to grab a passerby by the throat and start calling them ‘tricksie hobbitses’.”

“Also, do you remember that scene where Gollum asks Sam ‘what taters, eh?’  I could totally see Kate pondering such a question too….”

“She needs to start adding ‘elevensies’ into her daily routine.”

“Ugly, emaciated bad actress and probably major cokehead.”

You get the picture.  I don’t even like Kate Bosworth because she got to boff Orlando Bloom repeatedly and I didn’t, but damn!

Another remarkable thing is that the site has almost no pictures of male celebrities. I find that interesting, don’t you?

So what have we learned?  We’ve learned that if you want people to say nice things about you you can’t be fat.  If you’re fat people will say you’re lazy and compare you to produce.  You can’t be skinny either, because only coke whores and crackheads are skinny.  If you’re fat, go throw up right away, then click on one of the eating disorder clinic ads on the website.  You get to support the site that way too!  Unless you’re a man.  Then you get to do whatever you want. 

(But since Jennifer Love Hewitt is reported to be a size 2, and she’s fat, and you can’t get any smaller than a size 0, and only coke whores are size 0, what size are you supposed to be?  Is there something in between 2 and 0?  That’s what I don’t get.)

I wonder what kind of person would perpetuate (and participate in) such misogynistic hooey?  Probably a passive-aggressive wretch who spends her entire life wallowing in self-hatred and can only feel better when she’s insulting other people and scarfing Ben & Jerry’s by the gallon.  But I make no claims and guarantee nothing. 

Note to the person responsible for The Skinny Website:  there’s a difference between fun and cruelty, even when you’re talking about do-nothing celebrities.  And for future reference, here’s what real fat looks like:

_dsc0555red.jpg

I think you know what you can do with that.

(Don’t ever say I don’t put my ass into my work.)

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36 Comments

  1. People love to read that stuff, obviously. I’m sure each of them would hate it if it were written about them.

    I was going to check out the website but I decided they have enough hits already. Screw them.

  2. Is that really your ass?

    According to MSN’s home page, fat is the new normal. However, even though Love-Hewitt may have gotten “bigger”, a size 2 is very small! Way smaller than me and most other people I know.

  3. Rexi Bonesworth didn’t get to “boff” Orlando Bloom. She was contractually obligated to stand next to him and make people like you believe she was “boffing” him. Bearding works. The only one “boffing” Mr. Bloom is his boyfriend. And believe you me, his boyfriend is hot so be jealous of the both of them.

  4. Wonderful review. Having been a “fat kid” I see this type of website as bone-evil. But Al Gore did invent the internet for mindless insults and inane chatter, didn’t he?

  5. Pan, my ass and I always keep it real.

    Hey Mike, who cares? By the way, I was going to write a post about Orlando’s alledged gayness. Don’t think you were the inspiration, K?

  6. First and foremost, kudos to you for saying the word “boff” And I happen to agree with Mike. Even if no one else listens to me and Anners gets mad 🙂

    Secondly, aw I’m an excellent friend 🙂

    And thirdly, that site is evil. It’s run by the debil.

  7. I refuse to go to that site, but for the record, there is no way in heaven or hell that Jennifer Love Hewitt (whom I loathe) is a size 2. Holly Hunter is a size 2. JLH is considerably more zaftig than I am, and I’m an 8.

  8. I won’t go there either. Mentally sticking my tongue out at that site.

  9. Those commenters need to get a life. I was astonished to recently be led to a site devoted to Nicole Kidman’s forehead. Again, get a life.

  10. Sorry Mike and Daners, but Orlando Bloom is not gay…

    Wanda, I like how you mentioned that the SW owner claims to take a passive role… she’s all sorts of delusional.

    By the way, that ass of yers is not even fat…

  11. * Oh, and what’s up the avatars? I feel some loss of identity… 🙂

  12. 1. More proof we live in a world full of sick twisted people.

    2. I’m not going there. They have enough hits as is.

    3. You have a perfectly nice ass.

  13. I must confess, my personal photographer has touched up my ass.

    I don’t know about the avatars. I didn’t even notice….

  14. OK, despite myself I went there. I was led out of hatred for Jennifer Love Hewitt. I have to say what struck me most about her pictures was her repertoire of smarmy expressions, which are much more damning than her ass. She looks like someone should have slapped her once or twice in high school: it might have improved her personality.

    • the little fluffy cat
    • Posted December 11, 2007 at 7:42 pm
    • Permalink
    • Reply

    I should only look as good as you. Really, me + celebrity dish = you + poetry, you know? You’re my favorite skinny celebrity. 😉

  15. {{{Sissy}}}

  16. The whole concept of women’s bodies as fashion accessories subject to the whims of the industry is so far beyond creepy to me…the idea that a certain body type can be perceived as fashionable, like the emaciated flapper “look” of the 1920’s, the voluptuous pin-up girl 1940’s, the athletic look….

  17. What amazes me is that people actually have the time to devote to this kind of thing. Personally, I’m too busy to worry about the size of anyone’s ass, including my own.

  18. PS

    Anyone with the name “Orlando Bloom” kind of has to be at least sometimes gay.

  19. Baron: I agree.

    Forgive me, Wanda.

  20. Just in case you are wondering, this is what inspired my next comment.

  21. I wrote all of the comments about Kate.

    Kidding! Them are some scary slags at the site.

  22. As Wanda’s personal photographer, I can say that her ass did not require extensive photoshop retouching.(btw, if you right-click the photo, you can set the image as your wallpaper)

  23. Thanks honey.

  24. Okay, so now I have new wallpaper!

    * Wanda, why are you calling people back to your arse? You left me a link, u crazy person!

    Oh, Wanda, almost forgot: You are an honorary typHo: I made TypHo buttons! http://harkwhogoesthere.wordpress.com/typho/

  25. ^ Oh, I forgot to tell you I had another blog. That’s it in the link.

    Happy Weekend!

  26. i’m a 0…
    *does a huge line*
    and i’m a regular whore dammit!
    ahahahahahahahahaha

  27. Nice Site!

  28. Nice! Thanks!

  29. Hi Wanda,

    after reading your angry review, I’ll admit I just had to have a look. Now that I have, I’m not too sure exactly why you’re so angry about it.

    It wouldn’t be the first site where fans and haters of celebrities have left anonymous smack so why does this particular site anger you so much?

    I mean sure, taking a passive role means that more people can leave really random, stupid comments – which would definitely make me less likely to read them, BUT to be fair she does have posting rules and she does stick to them seemingly. She doesn’t say she’ll remove nasty comments about celebrities.

    I don’t feel that she herself says really nasty shit about the celebrities she puts up – so why are you so mad at her? Is it just that you don’t feel that people should be allowed to write comments that are just smack talk? I mean… it’s just like youtube though – lots of people round the world love to write their useless crap everywhere.

    Don’t get mad at me now! I’m not criticising you and I’m not supporting her. I’m just looking to clarify exactly what it is you find so hateful about her site.

    Cheers

  30. Hi Jen,

    I know she doesn’t say she’ll remove nasty comments about celebrities, that’s kinda the point. She won’t allow honest criticism about her website (she’ll ban you if you say anthing bad about it or her), but she doesn’t have a problem with the comments people make about celebrities? Did you happen to read any of the comments where they say “I know for a fact so-and-so is a coke addict”? A comment like that is, at best, irresponsible and, at worst, slanderous. I can’t stand the celebrity culture myself, but don’t you think comments like that are extremely unfair no matter how obnoxious and worthless a celebrity is?

    My main problem with the site is the fact that they criticize women for being too fat, then turn around and criticize them for being too thin. What kind of message does that send to the teenagers that you know are reading every word? It says that you can never, ever deviate from the “perfect” body, however elusive that perfection might be. And no one mentions that the perfect body is pretty much impossible to obtain without surgery, excessive, unhealthy dieting or exercising 10 hours a day every day. (Some of these women might be naturally thin but take it from one who knows, they won’t stay that way.)

    Thanks for stopping by anyway, come back any time.

  31. Hey Wanda,

    thanks for the reply. I know what you’re saying and sure it’s not good that people leave comments like that but I think people who are obsessed with celebrity culture are just… well.. people who say things like that. :\

    Yes some of the stuff they say is truly terrible – but that’s just the way people are. I mean, good people don’t go around saying or doing that sort of stuff but shitty people are a reality and I don’t really think that censoring them will really mean anything. If anything, I think it’s good to see just how terrible people can be because when you come across it in real life, at least you may not be shocked and can deal with it.

    Her site is largely unmoderated – just like life can’t be and while it’s awful to see, I don’t know if I really feel that it’s so wrong for it not to be. I wouldn’t do it that way and I don’t really want to see her site ever again but hey… she can do what she wants with her property.

    I also feel that such sites don’t have to be such a major influence on teens. I think we give them less credit than they deserve! We can influence them to not buy into this silly game.

    Well, that’s all I’ll say. Looks like you got mad at my question anyway! I just wanted to discuss it a bit!

  32. Not mad at all Jen, I don’t mind if people disagree with me. Thanks for the comments!

  33. JenniferLH a size 2??? Whatever makes her feel better. Yah, I have a pair of size 0 jeans in my drawer from when I was 15. So Im a size 0?

    Bad example…
    or have you not seen the pictures?
    That girl hasn’t brushed the chip crumbs off and lifted her fat, (yes Im sorry but IT is) @$$ off the couch in a long while.
    SHE isn’t FAT, but has a chunky untoned behind.
    There are girls who ARE skinny and get ridiculed on the site for being fat. Why dont you put a little more time into your post and find one instead of copying your friend’s post?

    And about the crackhead calling: its not because the celebs are too skinny for their liking. They look SICK like they ARE on drugs. Its not pointless dissaproval, its honest speculation. ITS TRUE.
    You wont find a healthy looking skinny girl being accused of using drugs. And if you do, well then you may prove a point.

  34. Excuse me Corey, but you have no way of knowing if a celebrity is a drug addict or not, and to say that they are in a public forum is slander.

    I won’t even address your other comments except to say that I never copy anything.

    Go away.

  35. Jennifer Love Hewitt is NOT size two. I’m a size two and she’s a great deal larger than me. She looks like a six or even eight. Even with a camera adding ten pounds, she’s not a two. If you don’t like the site, don’t go to it. It’s TOO easy.


3 Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. By Msense on 09 Dec 2007 at 8:14 pm

    […] Read the rest of this great post here […]

  2. By Deadpan » Happy Birthday Orlando Bloom! on 13 Jan 2008 at 1:35 pm

    […] you’ll recall, I posted a picture of my ass not to long ago.  I made a t-shirt with that ass on it, but it didn’t look right.  I […]

  3. […] you’ve been reading Deadpan for a while you might remember that I wrote my own scathing review of the site a few months back.  I’ll recap in case you don’t want to read it again.  […]

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